Deni's World

Hmmmmm...

2006-11-21T01:17:00.000-06:00

It's been a very long time since I regularly posted to this blog. I'm having a bit of insomnia tonight and I just reread every word I wrote on here. On my original entry, I mentioned something about cooking, recipe tips. Well, stay tuned for those. I should be able to share something I've been working on with you all before June. As far as the Scriptural writing, I should be able to share some of it before February. More original writing should also be in the works before the end of next year. Other than that, I plan to start posting again at least every month or two. I'm glad I reviewed this, because I'd forgotten how much I'd grown through writing for it. :)

Everyone, have a very Happy Thanksgiving!

Thought for the Day in the form of poetry

2006-08-07T20:26:00.000-05:00

A good friend recently made me aware of this poem. While it doesn't totally exemplify all of my beliefs, I love the meaning of it. I find it both inspiring and challenging.

Invictus
by William Ernest Henley

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

Out of the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced or cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

2006-04-04T18:06:00.000-05:00

Good thoughts

2006-03-09T10:39:00.000-06:00

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it

FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first
sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you

hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

If by Rudyard Kipling

2006-01-17T21:16:00.000-06:00

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blanimg it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for ther doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't five way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for foools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

Thought for the Week

2005-11-08T07:05:00.000-06:00

"I will act as if what I do makes a difference."
- William James"

Emotional awareness...

2005-10-15T09:55:00.000-05:00

In attacking goals, solving problems or just day-to-day living, it is very important to be emotionally-aware. I must know my limitations and barriers as well as my strengths and talents to accomplish something. If I am not aware of these I may not be able to accomplish anything at all because I am too oblivious as to what the reality of the situation is. I’ve had to realize some things lately that I was not ready to accept, but have dealt with them marginally well. With creativity and determination I know I’ll be able to improve my self-defeating weaknesses that I have allowed to be a part of myself at times. Attitude is everything, so be aware of how it influences you.

See more progress on: self-actualize

Open-mindedness...

2005-10-07T18:59:00.000-05:00

I have always thought of myself as an open-minded person. And, on the surface, I’m sure I do appear to be. I have recently realized that I need work on this area with respect to certain areas of life. This has been pointed out to me in a few ways lately. (No one’s told me this directly, I’ve just drawn some conclusions about this after some reflection on things.)

I think that this quality helps me be able to gain more knowledge before I make a decision, and therefore I make more informed decisions. So, I think that this is an important aspect of my self-actualization process.

See more progress on: self-actualize

Approach to problem-solving...

2005-10-01T07:11:00.000-05:00

I am not the world’s greatest problem-solver, so at times this gets a little tricky. But, the emphasis of this goal is to analyze how I do go about solving problems creatively. If I have a complex problem, sometimes creativity will suffer…but something that has helped me is breaking down the problem into sections. Each section will be more manageable than a large task. After a task is broken down, then prioritization must come into play. What are the most important tasks in this list? Incidentally a friend and I were having a discussion recently and “The Concept of Three” was mentioned. In stressful situations, most people can handle 3 tasks at one time…so choose your priority three tasks and focus on those. (I recently employed the 3 suggestion when approaching a specific problem lately, and it did decrease the amount of time I got my problem taken care of.) When doing the task, I work as hard as I can and also do it as ethically as I can. So, when I’m done with solving a problem or completing a task, I can feel proud about what I’ve done (thus eliminating another form of stress, guilt).

I’m not perfect in this by any means, but I do feel like I genuinely attempt to do the above. The point of self-actualization is not only to see what creative processes you employ, but to improve upon what you’re already doing…so this is a challenge to myself.

See more progress on: self-actualize

Weather...

2005-09-25T11:31:00.000-05:00

I love weather, but I fear it, too. Rita’s coming my way now…and my weather radio’s batteries just died…the two sets I had to replace them didn’t work either. So I’m praying that power doesn’t go out so I can keep abreast on the web! We’re under tornado watch, flood watch and wind advisory today. Look at the radar! Cool!...but a bit scary…this is the most organized system to be in our area in a while. (months)

See more progress on: Embrace changing circumstances in life without extreme levels of stress.

Optimism...

2005-09-24T13:48:00.000-05:00

In dealing with day-to-day life, I attempt to be consistently optimistic. This is not always the easiest thing to do, but I believe it is part of what makes me able to function as I do. In dealing with life, one has to see the positive sides of thing. Also, it is vital to be able to see benefits in everything. If at least one single benefit cannot be identified in a task, then I’m of the opinion one should re-evaluate whether they should participate in the activity. Life is short and there is only so much time that we have to spend here…so what time we do have should be spent doing worthwhile, beneficial activites.

See more progress on: self-actualize

I'm searching for options in my area...

2005-09-06T23:33:00.000-05:00

If anyone knows of any options in the Eastern West Tennessee region, please let me know. I think I can at least get some water together or something. I don’t have a lot of money to go donate, so it’ll have to be volunteering or donating stuff I already have.

See more progress on: Help victims of Hurricane Katrina

Week 3 on Make more healthy eating decisions. on 43 Things

2005-09-05T21:44:00.000-05:00

I cooked myself some lunch today and had the most wonderful simple vegetarian sauce with it. I wanted to share it with you.

* Empty a half of a regular sized can of Italian diced tomatoes into a saucepan.

* Drain the rest of the tomato juice out and put the tomatoes in a blender and purée.

* Add purée to saucepan and simmer covered.

* In same blender, put about 2 tablespoons of extra virgin olive oil, 1 tablespoon of Worchestershire sauce, 1/4 teaspoon onion powder, 1/2 teaspoon Lawry’s garlic salt, 1 teaspoon dried oregano leaves, 1 teaspoon dried basil leaves, a pinch of rosemary, two pinches of thyme, and 3 tablespoons water. Blend for several seconds and pour into tomato mixture recover pan and let simmer for 20 minutes. About 2-3 minutes before spaghetti is done, freshly grind black pepper to taste and thicken with about 3 tablespoons of Italian bread crumbs.

* Boil about 1 lb. spaghetti al dente in salted water with a little olive oil to prevent sticking for about 6-8 minutes. (Check at 5 minutes.) Drain water.

* Combine sauce with pasta and serve with grated parmesan cheese on top.

(Serves about 4 or 5 people)

Dreams and possibilities

2005-08-23T22:48:00.000-05:00

“So many dreams at first seem impossible. And then they seem improbable. And then when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.”—Christopher Reeve

See more progress on: share quotes

Respect...

2005-08-08T20:29:00.000-05:00

One of the things that I highly value is respect of everyone…whether they deserve it or not. This sometimes proves challenging when I am faced with situations, but I believe that this is what one person should show another. Many problems in the world may have been avoided if everyone held to this belief. One challenging situaton that I was faced with this past weekend was that I travelled with a sometimes annoying and loud person. Three days of semi-constant contact provided very challenging situations. Thankfully I remembered that respect is very important to me and I took the high ground at every turn in the road. I hope that I will continue to be able to treat everyone with this courtesy, and be able to spread this to others as a belief. I was motivated to write this after a friend’s situation reminded me this characteristic is so important to use consistently in one’s life.

See more progress on: self-actualize

This past Sunday,...

2005-08-03T06:51:00.000-05:00

I was visiting a church with my coworker, and a song that was sung really was inspiring to me. I thought it was a huge expression of faith. I was able to write down some of the words from the chorus. Sorry, this church didn’t have any songbooks, so I have absolutely no attribution for this. So, I hope some of you will find some comfort in it, too.

Lord, don’t move the mountain, just give me the strength I need to climb. Lord, don’t take away my stumbling block, just lead me all around.

See more progress on: share quotes

The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Cups of Coffee

2005-07-24T00:39:00.000-05:00

I didn't write this, but got this on my e-mail today. I found it inspirational. Sorry, I don't have an author's name to share with you.

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 cups of coffee... A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes".

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. "Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, " I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - God, your family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions -- things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car.

The sand is everything else -- the small stuff.

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Play with your children; take time to get medical checkups; take your partner out to dinner; play another 18.

There will always be time to clean house and fix the disposal." Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities.

The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

My international view of today:

2005-07-07T06:24:00.000-05:00

I just woke up within an hour ago and immediately heard of the attack on London. I am very saddened, outraged about this. This may not be the appropriate place to share this, but I want those in London and the U.K. to know my heart, thoughts and prayers go out to them at this time. I’m also praying that other countries and cities will stay safe.

See more progress on: Explore international views about the United States of America.

2005-07-01T16:10:00.000-05:00

Happy Independence Day, everyone!

Whether or not you're an American, I hope that you have a very happy and relaxing, restful weekend!

I'll be away most of Monday and Tuesday, so check back on Wednesday!

Another thought!

2005-06-23T23:53:00.000-05:00

"The most pathetic person in the world is someone who has sight, but has no vision.
- Helen Keller"

Thought for the Week

2005-06-18T20:13:00.000-05:00

I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.
- Lily Tomlin

Thought for the week

2005-06-15T00:47:00.000-05:00

"It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are."

Roy Disney

I've begun to get some responses...

2005-06-11T23:18:00.000-05:00

And I’m very thankful for the time different ones have been putting in with their comments! :)

I was talking to my mother tonight about this goal and she and my father lived in Europe for about 7 years. This was back in the 1970s. She said even then we (Americans) were viewed by many as arrogant, spoiled people.

I also wanted to further declare my purpose of this goal to everyone. I really want to know/understand what others’ perceptions are of this country. I am “sick and tired” (figuratively not literally) of hearing through the newspapers and television news and talk radio that “Everyone hates us [Americans}.” Personally, I think the media is a double-edged sword. On the one hand it can be useful, but on the other it can be very harmful. I don’t think that a majority of the media seek out the truth of situations at least in this country.

If it is true, and from the comments there is definite negativity toward the U.S., then I want to understand others’ perspectives. I’m not being judgemental about what I find out, but I do want to create an awareness of what kind of world I am living in.

A long story short is that I would like to consider actual individuals’ opinions rather than having a “blanket story” from tv, etc.

See more progress on: Explore international views about the United States of America.

My recent writing about stress and its management

2005-06-01T14:16:00.000-05:00

Preface

Stress is a major problem for people today. A simple Google Internet search on the topic of "stress help" resulted in 38,000,000 articles. Not only does stress affect a person physically, it affects one occupationally. There are several things that one can do to prevent and manage one's stress.

Introduction

Physical effects of stress are far-reaching. Muscle tension is something that is most easily recognizable. It leads to such problems as the colon, eyesight, headaches, asthma and backaches.1 A very important muscle affected by stress is the heart. Stress can overwork the heart muscle and lead to high blood pressure. 1 Other cardiovascular conditions include artherosclerosis and vascular headaches (also known as migraine headaches).1 The immune system can be underactive, hyperactive or have misguided activity as a result of stress. 1 Occupational costs have been calculated. "American businesses lose an estimated $200-$300 billion dollars per year to stress related productivity loss and other cost."2 Not only is stress a problem in the United States, but in the United Kingdom: "Stress costs councils around £120 million every year and accounts for about a third of working days lost through sickness absence."3

Stress-reduction Techniques

To reduce stress, one must understand the process of stress. Hans Selye identified this and named it the general adaptation syndrome. The first stage is called the alarm phase. In the alarm phase, a "complex physiological response [is] initiated by [the] presence of stressors triggers release of adrenaline, muscle tension and increased heart rate and blood pressure."1 The second stage is called the resistance phase. In the resistance phase the "body mobilizes to combat [the] stressor." 1 The third stage is called the exhaustion phase. "Resources become depleted; resistance breaks down; [and] disease or death may result"1 during this stage. It is important that the third stage is minimized or prevented altogether.

The first step in reducing stress is to identify the causes or triggers of stress. Answer the question, "What causes me to be stressed?" It is very important to identify it as specifically as you can. For example, if the real source of stress is relationship issues with one family member, the problem is not the entire family.

The second step is formulating a plan to deal with the issue of what causes the stress. Planning and goal-setting are vital in this step. In the example, one would set a goal to have a better relationship with the person in question. How does one form a plan to achieve this goal? Some suggestions would include: 1. developing better communication skills; 2. developing better boundaries with the person; and 3. developing better mutual understanding of each other. Make sure that people and other resources are identified who are qualified to help are included in the plan.

The third step is to execute the plan while using some stress reduction techniques. Stress reduction techniques include basic self-care, journaling, progressive relaxation, guided imagery, deep breathing and involvement in hobbies. Information on each of these will follow in the coming paragraphs.

Basic self-care is very important. To be able to deal with stressful situations, one must be at their best physically. To ensure this, one must get adequate sleep, nutrition and exercise. Most people will do well to get seven to ten hours sleep. One should be eating a well-balanced meal at least three times a day. Even if you only eat an apple or a couple of crackers, try to avoid skipping any meal. Exercise itself is a good stress-reducer. Try to exercise at least twice a week.

Journaling is something that anyone who can write will be able to do. Start by writing about everything that is causing stress. Then, one can go in either of two directions with this. The first option is to write about one is going about dealing with each stressor in order to create a reference book as to what works best. The second option is to write about all the stressors and everything about them. After this is over, then the page(s) can be torn out and destroyed. Methods of destroying them could include burning or shredding. This way, a person is given a chance to vent about it and look at it, but once the list is destroyed the person needs to set it aside.

Progressive relaxation involves a person getting in a very comfortable position while lying down. To begin one will start by tensing the toes for several seconds and then relaxing them. The process should be repeated until they are relaxed. After the toes are relaxed, then the feet are next. The next groups are as follows: calf muscles, thigh muscles, stomach, back, hands, lower arms, upper arms, shoulders, neck and face. Remember not to go to the next group until the one that is being worked on is completely relaxed.

Guided imagery also involves getting in a very comfortable position. Eyes should be closed. Think of the most relaxing place in the world. One will imagine being there. Focus on sights, smells, sensations, sounds, and tastes that are a part of the "relaxing place." Do this for several minutes.

Deep breathing will help one to calm down mentally and physically. To do this, sit in a comfortable chair or lie down in a comfortable place. Inhale slowly to the count of four seconds from the lowest part of the stomach. Hold the inhalation for a count of four seconds. Then, slowly exhale for a count of four seconds. Repeat this process for at least 5 minutes.

Hobbies are very good outlets for stress. They can occupy one's mind fully. Computers, art, music, writing, sports, etc. are all good activities that enrich one's life.

Conclusion

One does not have to let stress consume her life. There are several techniques that she can employ to reduce it in her life. For those who experience chronic stress problems, professional help may be needed to fully deal with their stressors. Stress is a problem, but it can be dealt with effectively.

Numbered references

1 Controlling Stress and Tension, 5th edition; Daniel A. Girdano, George S. Everly, Jr., Dorothy E. Dusek; Allyn and Bacon; Boston; 1997. (chapter 3)

2 http://www.holistic-online.com/stress/stress_introduction.htm

3 http://www.lg-employers.gov.uk/press/2004_news/stress_18_03.html

2005-05-27T22:00:00.000-05:00

I just wanted to tell each of you to have a happy Memorial Day! I know that it is a day for most of us to be off from work and get to relax
some, but let us each spend some time reflecting on all that lost their lives in military endeavors to protect us. Let us also remember
those who are abroad and stateside currently sacrificing for our well-being.

God bless you and God bless America!
Posted by Hello

Good poem I found...

2005-05-27T21:28:00.000-05:00

Unknown author, from an e-mail I received today.

Drinking from my saucer

I've never made a fortune, and it's probably too late now.
But I don't worry about that much, I'm happy anyhow
And as I go along life's way,
I'm reaping better than I sowed.
I'm drinking from my saucer,
'Cause my cup has overflowed.

Haven't got a lot of riches,
and sometimes the going's tough
But I've got loving ones all around me,
and that makes me rich enough.
I thank God for his blessings,
and the mercies He's bestowed.
I'm drinking from my saucer,
'Cause my cup has overflowed.

I remember times when things went wrong,
My faith wore somewhat thin.
But all at once the dark clouds broke,
and the sun peeped through again.

So Lord, help me not to gripe,
about the tough rows I have hoed.
I'm drinking from my saucer,
'Cause my cup has overflowed.

If God gives me strength and courage,
When the way grows steep and rough.
I'll not ask for other blessings,
I'm already blessed enough.

And may I never be too busy,
to help others bear their loads.
Then I'll keep drinking from my saucer,
'Cause my cup has overflowed.

Mental Health Issues...

2005-05-24T22:04:00.000-05:00

I don't consider myself an expert, but an active learner in the "game" of life. I want to let you know that I've come from a place where I had "way below sea level" self-esteem about 15 or 20 years ago to where I am today with "average" (whatever in the world that really is) self-esteem. What I do know about my past to present is that it has been a very hard, rough road to get to where I am. One of the most therapeutic things I started to develop was being patient with myself. You are not perfect, I am not perfect, and NO ONE is perfect in the world today. Always remember that. Do you expect others to be perfect? If you do, that's another issue; but, more than likely you don't. Why expect that of yourself? Then, after that, the best thing I've done for myself is to be extremely focused on taking care of myself so that I can help others and live at my maximum potential. Then, ridding myself of my hurtful things in my past was another important step in the healing process.

Finally, realize you didn't get to where you are overnight, so don't expect for your situation to remedy itself overnight, either. It will take time and determination. This will be an ongoing goal for you in the long-run, but it can be something that you only rarely think about anymore.

Once you've successfully dealt with an emotional issue, it gets easier the 2nd, 3rd, ... times.

Never give up on it or yourself!

Discussion welcomed...

2005-05-23T21:36:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - The new TV season: Be very afraid - May 23, 2005

The question is: "Is it just me, or do there seem to be fewer and fewer good 'new shows' with each passing tv season?" (Go to the above link to evaluate this.)

I don't know whether it is just that I'm "growing up" and not placing as much emphasis on tv nowadays, but there seems to be less that interests me with each passing year.

What does everyone think?

104

2005-05-17T12:45:00.000-05:00

Being fully rested and not tired. This vacation the friend that I’ve been visiting has really encouraged me to exercise and go on walks. I’ve slept better and I’ve been more mentally and physically alert. I hope to continue this trend after I get home…I just hope that the weather cooperates with me!

Happy Tuesday everyone!

See more progress on: identify 100 things that make me happy (besides money)

May 13 - May 17

2005-05-14T01:10:00.000-05:00

I will be on vacation! Yea!

I will try to update at least once, but may not get to or have time. Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!

Life philosophy 5- Revisited

2005-05-12T23:32:00.000-05:00

I am going back to work on this one further because I haven’t quite “mastered” the point of identifying “what I’m good at.” For background on this, go here: http://www.43things.com/entries/view/56245

As suggested I’ll start with the unimportant things:
1. Washing clothes and linens.
2. Keeping in touch with my closest friends.
3. Doing things slightly outside my comfort zone.
4. Spending money. (I’m definitely not a miser!)
5. Helping other people with mundane tasks.
6. Looking at things from a variety of perspectives.

Okay, so all of those aren’t unimportant, but that’s all I could come up with tonight. I’m tired and I know I’ll have more to write about at a later time, so “stay tuned”...

See more progress on: self-actualize

Life philosophy 11: VIPs in my life

2005-05-10T22:03:00.000-05:00

The ten most important people in my life are:
1. IHBH- My mother… She is my original “best friend.”
2. MPB- One of my best friends… She is just a positive person to associate with, and a caring person. She shares a lot of the same beliefs I do.
3. JPG- One of my best friends… He has been very influential in how I plan for things. My relationship with him has enlightened me about some areas of life.
4. DAH- My “adopted mother”... She is one of the most caring, accepting individuals I know.
5. BCM- One of my best friends… She is one of the most fun-loving people I know.
6. KDC- One of my best friends… She is one of the most spiritual people I know.
7. TCB2- One of my best friends and married to MPB… He is someone who challenges my thinking at times, and I’m sure he’s not even aware of it.
8. LLK- My 11th and 12th grade English teacher… She always encourage us to pursue arete, a word meaning “going beyond excellent.” I’ve tried to make this a foundation of my life.
9. RC- My first psychology department adviser and teacher… He has confidence that I’ll be a great mind in psychology. (I’m preparing myself to believe that.) He’s my motivation for graduate school.
10. MH- My first youth minister… He made me promise to “always be a faithful youth group member.” And, that is the reason I’m still a dedicated church member today.

This assignment has been very enlightening to me, and I came up with it! I think that i even found some more information about myself through it.

I think that the people one values is an important statement as to one’s identity. I’ve learned that I not only value my friend, but I value them for different reasons. I also value spirituality, character and intellectualism through the people I value.

See more progress on: self-actualize

Thought for the Week

2005-05-09T00:00:00.000-05:00

"I must Create a System or be enslav'd by another Man's."
-William Blake

Life philosophy 10: Time priorities

2005-05-08T15:32:00.000-05:00

If I only had one week left on this earth, I would spend my time doing the following:
# Praying for everyone I loved and was concerned for.
# Reading about Heaven in the Bible.
# Calling/Seeing others that I care about (as many as possible)
# I might have to try skydiving. (I’ve been intrigued, but I’m a bit scared of it, though.)
# See if there was any way possible to go to Europe with my parents (a life dream of mine, because that’s where I was born).
# Work one of the days at my job, and take the rest of the days off.
# Helping my family as much as I could with final arrangements.
# Continue to help others as I have the opportunity.

See more progress on: self-actualize

Life philosophy 9: What matters most to me

2005-05-08T14:43:00.000-05:00

What things matter to me most?

If I had to leave my home and never return, I would take the following 5 (if 5 was my limit) possessions with me:

My box of letters I’ve accumulated over my lifetime

One of my Bibles

My recipe book my mother made for me one Christmas.

My computer

Take my largest picture album and put all my favorite pictures in there.

(I’m assuming my cell phone would be in my pocket already, so I’d be taking that with me.)

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Life philosophy 8: Passions

2005-05-04T22:59:00.000-05:00

I have thought about this assignment, asked for clarification, and thought about it again. This seemed, at first glance, like a redundant thing to some of the other explorations I’d already done. However, I thought that I could have a little “creative license” with it. This is a goal who defines who I am, right? As Timothy pointed out, I have to make personal decisions and have to guide this goal to some extent for myself.

I decided to make a list, yet again, about what “causes” inspire me and I would either create charities or donate money to well-established organizations should Ed McMahon ever grace my doorstep (I know that’s not extremely likely, but this list will be a good thing to refer to if he does! :) ) This being said, money is not the only means that one can contribute to any cause. Personal time, work, etc. can be dedicated as well. I will pursue opportunities as they afford themselves.

1. My faith has been the foundation of my life since I was about 5 or 6 years old. I have taken mission trips, been involved with teaching at church, etc. since my induction as a member at the age of 12. Without my faith, I am almost certain I would not be at the point in life I am today. And, it is something I’m relieved that no one can take from me.

2. Holocaust awareness is something that I began feeling deeply about ever since I read The Diary of Anne Frank at a young age. In college I took a course called “Holocaust Films,” and it opened my eyes so much! I cannot truly express how deeply it affected my life, because seeing the documentary and the other movies we watched were truly emotional. It was like going through it without actually physically going through it. I do not believe that anyone should be treated the way the Jews and other demographical groups were treated in those days.

3. Education is something that cannot be taken away from anyone, either. I believe that an ounce of knowledge can help someone in their life. It may not be now, but it can have an effect on their future. I don’t think education should ever be underestimated.

4. Encouraging words are very powerful. On the converse, discouraging words are very powerful, as well. Never underestimate the impact of what you say to another person. I am convinced that some people might not behave in the way they sometimes do if they were fully aware of the exact impression they make in another person’s life. (if it is a negative behavior)

5. Mental health services are greatly needed! The resources for people who suffer with mental illness are very low, and are greatly needed. People with mental illness(es) are people just like you and me, they just need some accomodations. With those accomodations, they can function at a higher, more productive level.

6. Domestic violence is alarming to me! I’ve attended some workshops on the issue, and it is frightening what the victims go through to either separate from or live with some of these abusers! I believe everyone should be treated with respect. Domestic violence is NEVER warranted.

1 and 4 are things I’m already fairly involved with, so I feel good about where I am with that. I continually look for opportunities to support the other areas.

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Life philosophy 7: Deadening/Numbing "agents"

2005-05-03T21:36:00.000-05:00

This assignment is easy for once. I thought it would be another challenging one, though. However after some thought I was able to come up with a list fairly easily. I guess this self-actualization stuff makes you start processing things more easily…good side effect!

The orginal question for this assignment was “What deadens or numbs me from life?”:
1. Seeing or experiencing injustice.
2. Depression
3. Wondering what others think of me too much (on-again-off-again problem for me)
4. Fear of failure
5. Being closed-minded (even I have a problem with this with regard to some things. I’m not perfectly openminded, but I’m good about it a majority of the time.)
6. Trying to be perfect at times. (I know that this is an impossible task…sometimes I just don’t realize I’m trying to do it, and it ends up causing me extra added stress.)

These are all things that I have to deal with at times. The least problem is #2. I constantly work at trying to improve these weaknesses on my part, though.

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Thought for the Week

2005-05-01T23:21:00.000-05:00

"We are shaped and fashioned by what we love."
- Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

Life philosophy 6: Mind-wandering and self-discovery

2005-05-01T12:07:00.000-05:00

Before I get into this “chapter,” I want to welcome Molly to the team and this goal! I know that she’ll have some extremely good entries for us to read.

This chapter’s assignment was challenging like the last couple have been. I will be doing extra refinement of the “what I am good at doing” chapter at a future date due to the response I got. (For which I am very thankful, too.)

When my mind wanders, I have very random, disjointed thoughts. Many times, if my mind is wandering it will be like a brainstorming session. My mind will produce thoughts in a rapid-fire fashion. So, to list what thoughts my mind encounters when my mind wanders would be a seemingly endless task. However, when I do think about what gets further attention during these times, there are at least a few categories that I can name.

1. Worries. I am trying to minimize these in my life, because I am fully aware and know that it is useless to spend time worrying about things. If you can do something about it, form a plan and improve (or attempt to improve) the situation. Also, if you cannot do anything about it, then worrying will not change anything either!

2. Planning. I am a constant planner for the future. I want to make the most of every day that I’m given to live, and I think it’s a waste to not make the most of the time one is given.

3. Creative projects. When I want to try to get something done that requires creativity, I usually try to think of ideas of how to approach it. I usually try to approach the problem or project in a multiplicity of ways.

4. Relationship issues. If a friend, family member, coworker, or client is in need of extra help or a confrontation, I tend to spend time thinking of what will be the best way to interact with them to maximize a positive response from them.

While I didn’t know where this analysis would take me, I am glad to have examined it. This truly did help me “get to know myself” quite a bit better.

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Deni's Cooking Corner

2005-04-30T18:20:00.000-05:00

I have been cooking for years, and I believe that I have gotten quite talented at it. Hopefully, I can help you with my ideas and also make cooking a little easier with these posts. Sometimes it will come in the form of recipes, and other times it will come in the form of tips.

Today, I want to help you get some courage in the area of cooking. Cooking is fun, it should not be an intimidating task. However, I know that some people out there haven't been exposed to it as I was growing up. This entry is for those of you who don't cook often, and are maybe a little scared of cooking.

Start small! If you don't cook often, people who know you well will already know this. It's probably no secret. I want to challenge you to cook an entire meal for some friends or family members. (Don't go crazy and have your boss and their spouse over just yet, though.) Friends and family members will be forgiving if it doesn't turn out, and you can always get some fast food to quickly remedy the situation.

You don't have to cook from scratch to start out cooking. I began learning how to cook by making Tuna Helper, Kraft Maccaroni and Cheese, and Betty Crocker Original Super Supreme Brownies. These are fairly easy to do and easy to understand dishes.

Some tips to consider:
1. When shopping, always read labels. (If you need eggs and milk to make that boxed cake mix and don't already have them at home, there will be problems. Another key thing to pay attention to is time. You will be disappointed if you have 25 minutes to get a meal on the table and the potato casserole takes 45 minutes to bake.)
2. Learn how to use a mixer and blender. These are probably the most common pieces of equipment that you'll use when beginning to cook. (Electric mixers should never be started out on high speed. Always put the lid on the blender, too. If these things are not done, then you may have quite a mess on your hands.)
3. Cook things you know that you like. (You and/or your family will be eating any left-overs.)
4. Mistakes happen, so don't give up if your dish doesn't turn out well. Practice makes perfect. And, I along with others have all burned food, under-cooked food, mismeausred ingredients, etc. from time to time.
5. Double check your measurements.
6. If you're baking a cake, do not slam cabinets, doors, or drawers around the oven. It will make your cake "fall."
7. When preparing your menu, keep the four food groups in mind. Covering each group usually makes a satisfying meal.
8. When cooking for others, try to use nice tableware. Set the table nicely and use pretty plates, etc. (It doesn't have to be fine china and crystal goblets. Pretty stoneware and flatware works just as well for a casual meal.)
-As I think of other tips, I will relay them to you.

To come next time on DCC, will be an easy "Italian" meal.

Life philosophy 5: What I am good at doing

2005-04-28T20:25:00.000-05:00

I’m very uncomfortable with this assignment. I’ve rolled this idea around in my brain until I’m very anxious about it. I am definitely not a person who goes around telling others what I am good at doing. I don’t consider myself an expert at anything, really. Let me pose my response as to what I feel is the most important things are that I try to be good at:
# Listening. I’m able to listen to what others say most of the time, however due to my ADD (now the diagnosis is ADHD), I am sometimes not as attentive as I should be. People have told me that I am good at it, though.
# Caring for others. As long as there aren’t too many people to do this for, I feel as if I am very caring toward others. My friends and family feel this is a strong point.
# Writing. When I have the time, and concentration, I feel that I’m a decent, if not minorly talented writer. Lots of people have complimented me on my writing over the years.
# Adapting to changing circumstances. I may not be perfect, but I feel that I do this fairly well. I do meet some with resistance, but I do not fail to rise to the challenge normally. I would say with certainty that this is one thing on the list that I am at the minimum competent in.
# Artistic tasks. I have some artistic talent, though very neglected in recent years. When it comes to visual art tasks, I definitely am somewhat good at executing.
# Cooking. Modesty can be set aside for this one, I guess. I am extremely good at cooking according to me (and friends and family and coworkers)! I can do southern American, Italian, Mexican, and some Chinese.

I hope this is what you’re looking for, Tim! If not, though, I will continue to explore this area.

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Life philosophy 4: What enlivens me?

2005-04-27T22:36:00.000-05:00

This assignment has proven to be challenging, yet fun to dwell on for a while, too.

There are a few things that I’ve identified that enliven me:

My faith. If it weren’t for God being in my life, I seriously doubt I would have the quality of life I do. (Don’t misunderstand what I’m writing. I don’t believe that he is “rewarding” my faith. I also don’t believe that I have the best life in the world. I believe that my life would be tons worse without my faith.)

Helping others.” When I know that I’ve been able to help another person, I cannot fully express how elevated I feel. This is truly something I value highly in life. If I have helped any one person in my life have even 0.1% better life in this world (or the next) then I’ll believe my life has been worthwhile.

Highly positively charged environments.” No, I’m not talking scientifically here. I’m talking about when I’m involved in a group process and everyone is so closely connected working toward a goal with positive energy.

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Life philosophy 3: What bores me?

2005-04-26T20:49:00.000-05:00

When I contemplated this assignment, I wondered what in the world genuinely bores me? I usually can muster some involvement in just about anything, if I have to. However, I didn’t think that was the answer that was expected.

I think that this particular assignment does make me realize some additional information about myself.

Repetition. I cannot easily endure mindless, repetitive tasks for extended periods of time. I guess that this makes a statement that I like to use my mental abilities when doing tasks.

”Shallow” conversation. I have some friends and family members that could not hold an extended intellectual conversation if their lives depended upon it. (I don’t love them any less for this.) However, I do tire easily of their conversations due to this fact. I would interpret fromt this statement, that intellectual stimulation is something I highly value.

I hope that I didn’t “miss the mark” on this assignment!

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Wonderful Quote I Read

2005-04-25T19:54:00.000-05:00

"One should count each day a separate life." -Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Life philosophy 2: My enthusiasm

2005-04-24T21:40:00.000-05:00

The second through eighth life philosophies that I will list are motivated by my team partner’s request to cover these areas as a starting ground. They are very good areas to explore, so I’m excited with the assignments! I’m giving myself a little while to think about each one, so please be patient.

My enthusiasm comes from being involved in projects, tasks, or meditations. I love the simple process of being involved in something, so the opportunity to work on goals with others (via 43T) and the opportunity to express myself without the worries of editing (via deni’s world) along with the new club in the community are all very important avenues to help me be me. It also helps me value myself a little more, as well (something I discussed in previous life philosophy).

That being said, I think that it is vital for everyone to be involved in at least one thing outside of themselves. Some may only be able to handle a job, and others may be able to be a worker and juggle 12 other activities. Whichever person you happen to be, it is worth the while to be involved in something. This is my challenge to you today.

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Thought for the Week

2005-04-23T23:30:00.000-05:00

"What you can BECOME is the best of what your ARE." Timothy Hamilton, Apr 23, 03:07PM, 43T comment

Information about self-actualization

2005-04-23T21:54:00.000-05:00

For those that may not know what self-actualization is all about, I don’t really think that’s something abnormal. I had to do some serious research about this goal before I accepted it as a goal on 43T.

This is what I’ve found about self-actualization:
"Abraham Maslow was humanistic psychology’s leading theorist and organizer. Beginning as an experimental animal psychologist, he turned his attention to the problem of creativity in art and science. He studied creative people and concluded that they were actuated by needs dormant and unrealized in the mass of humanity. He called these people self-actualizers because they made real—actualized—their human creative powers, in contrast to most people, who work only to satisfy their animal needs for food, shelter, and safety. Maslow concluded that creative geniuses were not special human beings, but that everyone possessed latent creative talents that could be realized if it were not for socially imposed inhibitions."

Source: Thomas Hardy Leahey, A History of Psychology: Main Currents in Psychological Thought, 4th ed., Prentice Hall, 1997, page 424

Life philosophy 1: Value of Self

2005-04-23T21:39:00.000-05:00

After several days of thought about this goal of self-actualization, I decided that valuing one’s self is the paramount foundation of life. I believe that life is best for me and others when I value myself. How do I value myself? Well, I attempt to eat well, sleep well, emotionally care for myself well and do other things to ensure I am well taken care of. So, this is a “core” value to me as a person.

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Thought for the Week

2005-04-22T23:41:00.000-05:00

"When approaching happiness, don’t think of finding it or achieving it. It is always a state of being." Deni H.

Welcome to my world!

2005-04-22T01:29:00.000-05:00

Things to come on my site:

Original writing
Recipes and Cooking Tips
Thought for the week
Scripture Focus
Motivational tidbits
Deni's philosophy

This is a totally new thing for me, so please have patience while I'm learning!